Parents, because we are hard-wired for law, it is easy to drift into the default mode of a legalistic, external conformity to a psuedo-form of Christianity that is a mere parody of life in Christ. There is NO fruit in this. It leads to a lifeless, disciplined drudgery. That's why some of the most miserable people in the world are not outright pagans but professing Christians who aren't walking in grace. When this is the case, it will have a detrimental effect on our parenting because there is nothing contagious about this kind of life. If this is Christianity, children reason, who wants this?
Soren Kierkegaard writing in 1850 in his journal (and probably reflecting insights in his own home) notes the greatest danger for a child, where religion is concerned: The greatest danger is not that his father…should be a free-thinker not even his being a hypocrite. No the danger lies in his being a pious, God-fearing man and in the child being convinced thereof but that he should nevertheless notice that deep in his soul there lies hidden an unrest which consequently not even the fear of God and piety could calm. The danger is that the child in this situation is almost provoked to draw a conclusion about God, that God is not infinite love.
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